Tag Archives: moving

God Formed a New Ear on a Grown Woman

3 May

Maddie

Have you ever thought about the way life begins anew, with a fetus growing into a little one with hands, feet, and everything else?  It’s sort of mind-blowing, isn’t it?  Well, I discovered that God forms new creatures even outside of the womb.  The thing is, He answered prayers and sort of changed me into a new person as a result of a desperate plea for help.

If you read my last post, you know that I’ve been guilty of behaving badly when moving.  I moved this week, and my youngest daughter helped me.  She had pretty much dreaded being with me in my “moving mode.”  But instead of me getting all edgy and sharp, I was relaxed and generous and sweet and loving.  We actually enjoyed our hard work, and we worked as well together as two people possibly can.

Maddie said, on several occasions, that we were a good team and the move couldn’t have gone any more smoothly than it did.  She appreciated the Starbucks coffees I bought her and the lunch and the general willingness to bend over backwards for her because she was working like a mule for me.

But it was a miracle that I acted appropriately.  How did God do that?  I have a track record of allowing worries to affect me in high stress moves, though normally I’m a person who refuses to worry for more than a few minutes, consciously, anyway.  Faith is all about remembering that God has us in the palms of his hands.  He doesn’t cough and look away, not even for one millisecond.

I know what it is that’s bothering me during these moves.  I’ve had some really bad experiences in which movers went so far as to scare me with threatening behavior.  Don’t want to go into all that, but I ended up fearing what may happen and how I may be overcharged.

Everything in my life fits as part of God’s plan for my life.  There aren’t any particular days or events in which I need to take up the mantle of worry and stress.  Since I believe that all things are working together for my good, I can behave like a sincere follower of Jesus Christ at all times of the day and night.  And when it was that this sank in well enough to turn my behavior completely around is a mystery, like when God fashions an eyeball.

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Don’t Pry the Clutter From My Cold, Dead Hands

14 Apr
office supply barrette

office supply barrette (Photo credit: jamelah)

Gifts come in all forms, and one gift I want to leave my children is a lack of clutter to deal with when I change my residence to heaven.  I’ve been working on getting rid of stuff for years now.  It’s most difficult for me to let go of anything related to writing or office supplies.  I discovered today that I also hang onto the children’s toys.  They have boxes of things to play with, yet all they usually want to play with is their DS.  I’ve put the multiple pieces of various toys together.  But what I really need to do is donate more than the one box I’ve got ready to give away right now.

When I move (again!) soon, my goal is to have gotten rid of the approximately 10 or 12 boxes that were in a storage unit.  Now everything will be in one apartment while at the same time not crowding us out of our closets.  Amen.

Why is it so dang hard for me to let go of these little things that, put together, add up to boxes of clutter?  I absolutely love feng shui, the minimal environment that promotes inner peace (I don’t pay attention to the parts of feng shui that could be considered a form of worship of other gods.)

In my clutter devotional called Devotional for Clutterers by Melody Carlson, today I read the thing that I believe most about this entire struggle.  Carlson says, “As we become more orderly and less cluttered, we focus less on surviving and more on actual living.”

The Lord is good and is helping me through a lot.  But He doesn’t mind that in the midst of it all, I’m asking Him to help me eliminate all the clutter I possibly can before we move into our new home.  Nothing is too hard for God!

I just know I’ll sleep more peacefully knowing that when I ultimately fall asleep for the last time, my children can deal with their grief without having to deal with my clutter.

In case you’re wondering why I’ve got my own death on my mind, it’s because I secretly wonder if moving twice in one month is going to kill me!  lol

Out of a Trance and Facing the Original Big Fear

12 Apr

”]Cover of "Matrix-Trilogy [Blu-ray]"Didn’t the mass population in The Matrix sort of go through the motions of life without truly living?  That’s how I remember it, anyway.  At this point in my life, with no clue where to move as we leave this toxic apartment, I believe God may be giving me a wake-up call, as though I’ve been just going through the motions without committing to living for Him the way I’m supposed to.  Do you know who I think has a much better grasp on living for God than most of the rest of us?  The Amish.

No part of me believes for a second that I could exist as an Amish person because I’ve always been such a staunch individualist and entirely too impractical.  But I aspire to change my daily routine and my consistent actions as a parent raising these two young ones in my care.  I’m responsible for raising two grandchildren, ages 8 and 3; have I mentioned that?

I’m facing such a dark time right now, since where I’m supposed to live is so uncertain.  And it’s ironic because when I first became a Christian part of the reason I chose to marry the man I did (the wrong man) was because of the security of having a home.  He had established a career at a young age, and he was more responsible than any young man I’d ever met.  (Enough about the unfaithful ex.)

One of the first things I came to an agreement with God about was that, since I’ve always loved “home” and could easily panic about problems related to where home is, I would trust Him completely as regards every place I live for the rest of my life.   (This was after realizing that my marriage was a bit of a nightmare.)

And yet here I sit in a toxic apartment in which all kinds of personal turmoil with other family members has got each of our three lives reeling.  It’s like we aren’t on sound footing.  The toddler has taken to nervous eating, though I’m not going to let that continue, for her sake.  We’ll get more active together starting tomorrow.  And my 8-year-old has been consistently on his worst and most defiant and disobedient behavior.

The Bible talks about rejoicing always, and I believe we really are supposed to do that.  And right now, in spite of the yuckiness of the place I’m currently in, I am excited knowing that God is going to use this experience to set me on a better path to serving Him in the home.  An improved “me” will emerge from this creepy juncture of my short stay on the earth.

And while many people may think that living the way the Amish do is a bit creepy, I think it’s a great example.  I believe God intends us to be intentional in our separation from the ways of the world and in our devotion to Him.  And one of the most wonderful aspects of the Amish life is community – home and family and community life is very strong.  None of the faithful would ever have to wonder where they’re going to be laying their head for the next year.

Oh, wow, it just came to me that Jesus once said he had nowhere to lay His head.

You see how all over the place I am?  That’s one of the effects of not knowing where my place in the world is.  Very disconcerting.  Good thing God is so very faithful.  All will be well.

The True Test of Friendship: Help With Moving

23 Mar

My move is practically upon me, and all of the extra help fell through.  I’m a tad discouraged by this fact because of this new problem with my health, in that my hands in addition to my elbows hurt constantly.  I’m not just being whiny.  Tendonitis and debilitating arthritis combined would be a pain challenge for anyone.  But, anyway, I’ve lived long enough to know that anyone who makes the necessary sacrifice to help you move is usually a rare and fiercely loyal friend.  Now, help could still be forthcoming; the move hasn’t happened yet.

When the movers come, I’ve already decided that I’m going to allow the nature of Jesus Christ to shine through instead of my usual nervousness caused by some horrible moving experiences.  God is the one who provides for me, and my being upset and edgy about spending extra money on a move doesn’t help anything.  When I accomplish this goal, I will give all the glory to God because I think it’s impossible for me to do it myself.

Calm washes over me when I think about the fact that no matter what else happens with this move or in life, God is the most faithful friend.  He has never let me down, and I know that He never will.  He is Love; and I can trust that if anything bad has touched my life, He allowed it for a good purpose.  With God on my side, I’m never alone or without help.

Psalm 46:1

New King James Version (NKJV)

46 God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.

 

The Miracle of the Boxes

15 Mar

Do you have little categories of worry that are part of your identity, in a way?  For me, it has been a fear that I wouldn’t have the boxes I need for a move.  One of my former employers was amazing about supplying, free of charge, the best quality boxes for moving.  They were boxes left over after the files that had been stored in them were destroyed.

Since I don’t work at that company anymore, I was so worried when I moved about a year ago.  How could I get some good quality boxes just like that without paying $30 to $60?

Lo and behold, I went to an office for an appointment not knowing the location had been moved.  And guess what was piled up in a cage-type of moving truck?  About 50 brand new boxes just like I got from my former employers!   And the moving guys told me to help myself to all that I wanted.

I thought that box miracle was astounding and showed the love of God just for me.

Well, I move next week and God has done a whole new kind of box miracle.  I expressed to one of my daughters that I was worried about where to get boxes, and she said, “Just get them at HEB.  That’s what all of us do.  And, frankly, we’ve never understood why you always freak out about boxes.”

Another daughter has just moved back from California and I asked if I could have some of her boxes.  And she told me the same thing.  Yes, I could have her few boxes; but just go to HEB.

Well, I did just that.  I also went to Walmart, and between the two stores I got all the boxes I think I may possibly need for the move.  It was free and it was easy.  The kids slept through it all, since their aunt and cousin spent the night.  All I had to do was stay up really late and go out and about until 1:00 am.  But I found that God gave me opportunities to be a blessing to tired people who have to work these tough hours.

And what am I going to put in all of these boxes?  A lot less than I did for my last move, good Lord willing.  I’ve been downsizing for years now because I don’t want to someday leave behind a mountain of clutter for my family to have to deal with.  Yes, I have traces of pack rat syndrome in my blood.

The hard part of this move is, of course, ahead of me, though I will hire movers.  And all three of my daughters will help tremendously.  But I’ve already received a new freedom inside because the Lord has shown me on a new level that there is never anything for me to worry about.  He has everything covered.  And I believe that the more clutter I let go of, the more room there will be in my life for beauty and freedom of simplicity.

Such a refreshing in my Spirit God has given me on this late night of preparing to move.  Who would have thought that box collecting could be an occasion to be filled with the joy of the Lord?